HOBO HOMEFRONT: Before speaking, consider what you're really saying

Published: Monday, March 24, 2014 at 08:06 AM.

During a conversation, people tend to use certain communication styles to achieve a certain goal.

Here's a list of what I mean:

Avoiding: Sidestep, postpone or withdraw from the issue. Use when potential harm outweighs benefits to resolve a matter, or when time is needed to collect information or cool down.

Accommodating: Sacrifice your goals to satisfy another party's concerns or yield to another point of view. Use when relationships are most important or to reach a quick, temporary solution.

Controlling. Pursue your goals without the other person's agreement. Use when unpopular actions must be implemented or when inaction will produce dire consequences

Compromising. Provide quick, mutually acceptable alternatives — or both parties give up something. Use when two parties of equal power are strongly committed to mutually exclusive goals or to achieve temporary solutions for complex issues.

Collaborating. Identify each person's concerns and find alternatives that meet both sets of needs or find solutions that fully satisfy both parties' needs and concerns. Use when relationships and issues are both important or to gain commitment and acceptance for a high-quality decision.

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